Friday, April 27, 2007
Do I hate a 7 year old?
Recently I've been going through somewhat of an identity crisis. I haven't been able to hate with the fervour and passion I once took so much pride in. I wake up in the morning, look in the mirror and don't know who I am anymore. Could it be that my zest for hatred has left? How could this be? I once considered myself a hateologist if you will. Specializing in the ridicule of others (who deserve it) for my own amusement. I used hate like Popeye uses spinach. Children's tears brought me strength, the stupidity of others warms my heart...and not in a hallmark moment kind of way. More like a seething hatred that makes me wanna bust them in the head with a lead pipe or whatever makeshift weapon I can find nearby. It's not that I'm a mean guy, I'm prolly the nicest person you know. But I am a smart ass, and when I see something stupid millions of hateful insults flood my cerebral cortex. I truly feared this trait of my personality had left. Had I misused my power..the gift of hate? over used it perhaps? Had I forsaken it or had it forsaken me? Then suddenly while deep in meditation watching Run's House, my questions were answered.
Rev Run's youngest son is a lil punk. Yes I said it! Not only has my hate returned, it now knows no limitations. Little kids can get it too. I know he's only like 7 or something but allow me to get Alec Baldwin on his punk ass for a minute. I'm sure Russy is a very nice boy, but he is also a brat. What kid breaks his own toys and is punished my receiving new ones and going to anger management classes? I plan on being a psychologist, and do you know what my advice to Rev Run would be during therapy. The next time Russy has a tantrum and breaks his Gameboy, be calm. Don't raise your voice...maybe even smile a bit. Pat him on the head, make him feel safe and secure like he wont be in trouble. Then when he's least expecting it, take what's left of the game boy AND BEAT THE HELL OUT OF HIM WITH IT. That may sound harsh, but a good ass whoopin never hurt anyone. By no means am I advocating the abuse of children, but everyone I know who did receive physical discipline including myself, didn't break their own toys. I knew when I was youngster that if I broke one of my ninja turtles cuz I was salty about missing the last five minutes of Inspector Gadget, there was a strong chance when my parents found out Leonardo would have been lodged in my ass attached to my dads puma's. So Rev in the words of Alec Baldwin..."Straighten him out!"
by the way, Alec Baldwin is a real ass. He got so gangster on his own daughter he forgot how old she was. I mean if you're gonna shit on a kid at least no how many years of their childhood innocence you are stripping away from them when you do it. Folks please remember this hate blog is all said in jest. Degrading children is WRONG! yes it's fun, but its still WRONG. So in the interest of not getting sued, I would like to go ahead and give a half hearted apology to the whole simmons family. and Rev, for what it's worth "Down with the King" is one of my favorite songs ever, and it's in my ipod right now.
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48 comments:
hate on brother... and yeah rev spits on that track. But he looks so unnatural in his body movements.
mike w
yea man the song is still fire.
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